Why have I only had sex twice in the last 10 years?
I think an explanation works best by looking at it from the opposite direction.
Reasons why a woman might want to have sex with me:
Because she believed some lie I told her in order to get laid.
Not gonna happen.
Life has taught me that dealing with the ultimate result of interacting with
the person to whom I lied makes the sum total of the experience less pleasant than just
masturbating with internet porn and a silicone fake vagina.
Because it's an integral part of a long term peronal romantic relationship
I'm not monogamous, and I like living rural.
Polyamorous women exist. They're findable, but my experience is that they
prefer to settle down in an urban setting. I like all the modern in-home technological
conveniences, but I want to live out of sight & hearing of my nearest neighbors, make
my own electrical power, grow my own vegetables, process my own sewage, etc.
I'm aware that being poly and wanting to live where there are no convenient choices
for multiple partners are fundamentally at odds with one another.
Also, I generally don't pursue romantic relationships. I find that they leave me
with memories of being unhappy, and that they're hard to cope with. If I need to reduce
my level of happiness, I'd rather just smack myself in the shin or the knee with a hammer
or a large steel wrench. It's almost as effective a happiness reduction technique and
is generally a lot easier to cope with.
The analogy I tell myself is that women I'm attracted to are like yachts. Sure they're
attractive, but that doesn't mean I'm going to have any of my own. (The analogy is
limited: The people are not property feeling is very strong with me.)
Because she's interested in recreational sex. In my experience women who are interested in recreational sex aren't interested in doing that with me. A few reasons are:
I'm 45 (when I typed this - subtract 1965 from the current year)
I'm more than 20 pounds overweight.
My penis size is two standard deviations below the mean.
I'm slow.
I'm sexually inexperienced.
I'm slow on the uptake also. If a woman actually was interested, she'd have to express
that interest using short direct sentences in plainly spoken language. Women have never expressed
this type of interest in this manner when speaking to me (since grade school, anyways).
Because I paid her to. I should do this more (I think more happy memories of sexual
interaction with women would be beneficial in my life.), but I always want to do it where it's
legal, and I'm really bad
about spending money on experiences instead of gadgets. I've been intending to go see the
rain forest on the Olympic Peninsula for years, but I've never actually gone. Usually when
I'm on vacation and I travel, it's to visit some specific person, and then I always hang out
with them, not hire prostitutes. Also, the people with whom I visit most always live in the USA.
Because she wants to feel good about herself for having improved someone else's life.
I've heard guys talk about women like this, but I've never met any woman who made me aware that
she had this sort of attitude.
Because she happens to be bored, wants to releive the boredom with sex and I'm there. This
just hasn't chanced to happen in the last 10 years.
For some other random reason that hasn't happened in the last 10 years.
I'm not worried about it. There's no lack of orgasms. I don't need to occupy the time and body of another person just to keep the physiological need to reproduce from getting my psyche out of balance. There's definitely lack of romance, but I don't consider that attempting that will lead to attaining it. I think I'm well adapted to doing without.